(no subject)

[weezingsoul.livejournal.com]

<sub>i had my first visit to the gynecologist today...

and it was, honestly, the most painful thing i have experienced. ever. and i am usually very good about withstanding pain with a stony disposition, particularly at the doctors', but i had to hold my face to keep from crying from the moment she opened the speculum (2 clicks) until the moment it was removed.

otherwise, things went fine.. my doctor seemed a little distracted, i guess. i'm trying to figure out why it hurt sooo much.. maybe it's because i'm a virgin and a tampon is the widest thing that has been placed in my vagina, but all the stories and even the explanation at Scarleteen have said that it wouldn't hurt *too* much. maybe i was nervous; would that make a big difference?

i won't have to go back for at least a year, but... any suggestions or...anything to try to keep in mind for next time to make it less excruciating?</sub>

Comments

[dichotomise.livejournal.com]

I'd only started going to the gyno after I had had sex, so I don't know how much of a difference it would make to be a virgin. I would guess, though, that your nervousness would make you tense your muscles and resist the speculum. Kind of like with a tampon; if you're clenching a lot, it's not going to get very far, and forcing could be painful. My advice would be to try to relax, take some deep breaths, maybe ask for a mirror so you can watch and know what's going on down there.

[cuzgoatsrkool.livejournal.com]

when I had my first pap I had already had sex (although i've never used tampons in my life) and to me it hurt like HELL and I bled for about a week afterwards...not the same as a period but as if something had been cut I guess. It was horrible :(
But, after that I found a clinic in town where I go to University and got it done basically pain free....so I guess you just never know...

[sterlingspider.livejournal.com]

Your virginity shouldnt make that much difference in opening a speculum. It sounds like a lot of it may have been nervousness as it is not uncommon to clench when you are nervous (the really bad, but rare, level of this is called vaginismus).

Though here is the slight possibility that you are too narrow and you may wish to speak to a dr about that if it turns out to be the case. A friend of mine had that issue and was not able to have sex, use tampons, or have a proper gyn visit until she had some minor surgery to correct that.

[babybloodheart.livejournal.com]

Being nervous would have made a big differance because you would have been tensing up. You should have told them to stop, an exam with a speculum should not hurt, there is no reason for you not to have asked them to stop, and either compose yourself there or rebook another apointment.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_last_serenade_/]

you said your doctor seemed distracted? i'm thinking that might have been a big part of it. if she wasn't conciously thinking "this gal's a virgin...i need to be careful", then it would have been really easy for her to just click the speculum open like she does with everyone else (women who have had lots of pap smears before and don't think twice about the speculum).

you might want to see about finding a different doctor. and by all means, call your doctor's office and explain why. it sounds to me like you may have had a bad experience because of the carelessness of your doctor. *hugs*

[erinmdmd.livejournal.com]

I was in pain (and a virgin) the first time I went to the gyno. It hurt me for a few days afterward as well... but more uncomfortable pain. I'd never even used a tampon, and all of the sudden I had this giant (or so it felt) metal think in there... it was not so pleasant.

I guess relaxing might help. I personally haven't gone back to a gyno since then, because he made me feel pretty uncomfortable. That might not be the best solution though.

[barisaxyvet.livejournal.com]

Did you doc KNOW that you were a virgin? Often times, for first-time pelvics, "virgins", and smaller females, a doctor will accomodate by using a pediatric speculum. I have a friend who is 23, actively having penetrative vaginal sex with a bioguy, and they STILL have to use a pediatric speculum to get the exam done.
Don't let this deter you from getting your pelvic each year. It is really important and can be a truly wonderful experience, especially if you use a mirror and watch what is going on and look at your cervix!!

[weezingsoul.livejournal.com]

indeed, she knew i wasn't sexually active and that it was my first time. everyone said she was gentle, so i think next time i just need to reeeally relax :)

[emmeangel.livejournal.com]

i was a virgin when i went to have mine done, and the smaller speculum (i guess it was a pediatric one) didn't hurt at all. i told her i was a virgin, too, so that might have helped you to let her know. it was uncomfortable to have in in there, but not painful. you were probably just so tense that your clenching made it hurt. i hope you can try an relax next time, either by doing breathing exercises or listening to your cd player. i hope that helps.

[psycheague.livejournal.com]

You absolutely have to relax when you're at the gyno. Tell her that you're feeling pain and she may put more lube on or something else to help. I'm sorry you had such a rotten time. It's not supposed to be fun or anything, but it's never hurt me so bad that I wanted to cry. *hug*

[jaipur.livejournal.com]

My first gyno visit was when I was still a virgin too, and the doc couldn't get the speculum even *in* without me screaming in pain. I totally hear you--it was excruciatingly painful. It was an unsuccessful visit, and they told me to a) wait 'til I'd broken my hymen or b) try inserting my finger or a tampon to help stretch it out. I ended up waiting a few years 'til I was sexually active. Some people are nervous and clamp down, some of us have hymens of steel. ;) If you really have to go back and do it again in a year (if you're not sexually active why do you need an annual gyno visit?) then stretching yourself out with small vibrators or your fingers might not be a bad practice.

[weezingsoul.livejournal.com]

my dermatologist put me on ortho-tricyclene for my skin, and i needed to get a pap smear in order to renew the prescription.

thank you for your advice :)

[weezette.livejournal.com]

Number one, relax, that helps a lot. Also, talk to your gyno the next time you go to see her. When I went for the first time, my gyno had me go into her office and talk to her, so she knew that I was a virgin and that I was nervous about the pelvic exam. I think because she knew that information, she was very gentle and I experienced no pain. She also told me everything she was doing as she did it, which eased my nervousness also. So just try to relax (I know that's hard, especially after dealing with pain!) and make sure you talk to your gyno.

i still get shivers

[jchinique.livejournal.com]

I am almost 37 and have been seeing my gyno almost yearly since I was 18 and sexually active. I hate hate hate the speculum! relaxing helps, my dr's office has pretty postcards tacked to the ceiling so you can imagine you're on an exotic beach somewhere, lol! You can also take 2 or 3 advil about an hour before you go but be sure you let the doctor know. I still get nervous and start to clench up. Last visit he told me (after 2 kids, both c-sections) "yeah, your pelvic opening is a little smaller than average"
which came as a total shock to me because I have these humungo childbearing hips! BTW, I also don't use tampons for the same reason.


ok TMI, i know but i just wanted to say that you are not weird or anything, I'm pretty sure a lot of women feel the same way.

[skeptictank.livejournal.com]

My doc had an assistant in there with her the first time I went. The assistant kept reminding me to breathe, and every so often when I tensed up a muscle that I shouldn't, my doc would stop what she was doing and touch it gently so I knew that I had to focus on relaxing that perticular area. It also helped that she told me everything she was doing just before she did it so nothing was a surprise.

You might want to request a different doctor next time you go. Maybe ask if there's one in that office who is especially used to working with teenagers/virgins/first timers.